Friday, January 04, 2013

Weight Of Forgetfulness~


The poem is written for Three Word Wednesday, where the prompt is to write using three words: idle, nagging, pace. Also written for Poet's United



My mind is as idle
as I am today; it has stopped
dealing in possibilities,
It is waging a useless war with
 ‘omitted memories’
Nothing re-assembles, as I
contemplate
…just a diary, & some photographs
live and breathe for my everyday use.
I struggle to forget
the torment of losing my mind.
Oh, yes…memory-loss!
The shock is deep; it carries me
a dozen paces away from my past,
 I pause, reflecting…
Ah Memory’--- is such ‘a fickle thing’
Forgetfulness stares at vacuity
The nagging disease
Degraded the cognizance
a little everyday; and
traversed into a life 
Which has no prologue, 
epilogue…Or postscripts today
Real, living history
Perceptibly converted into
a shifting maze....still
I go on...
Searching...playing
 a crazy mind's game; 
Can you fill the chasm, and help me
re-tread the roads that still exist...?
Help me please, give words to my thoughts
so that I can carry on in a world
I call my own...




Dedicated To:
All those who suffered through,
 Alzheimer's Disease. 
(This includes the caregivers)
 

80 comments:

  1. wonderful poem, Panchali di. My grandmom who will be 90 this year has fits of short term memory loss, so I can well relate to this.

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    1. Roshni. Such a pleasure to see you here again.Yes, I took care of my father-in-law who had severe stage of Alzheimer's. So, I know the trauma well...
      Glad it touched you.Thank you for a very gratifying compliment :)))

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  2. your poem is so insightful and sensitive it - you have given me a new
    understanding of this trauma.

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    1. Paige...May all writers be blessed with readers such as you... :)
      Thanks for the visit and that encouraging comment...!

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  3. Lovely poem Panchali. Oh yes, memory-loss! So touching..

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    1. Diwakar...! Don't you dare disappear again...! :))Thanks for your visit and wonderful compliments!I am touched...

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  4. Yes you have pinned the pathos of memory loss so acutely.It is terrible also for the caregivers--i have been through it.

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    1. Indu...You made my day!Thanks !!
      Even I saw the helplessness of the mind when I took care of my father-in-law in his advanced stage of Alzheimer's; so it was easy to write...
      :)

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  5. very sensitive, poignant write up, Mam. Kudos to you! I also agree to Indu Mam, it is very difficult for the attendants too.

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    1. Sooo pleased you liked it, Meenakshi....! Thank you for the kudos.... :))))
      Yes, it is in fact tougher for the caregivers. I have gone through it, so I know it so well.
      Thanks re..

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  6. Delightful as ever...and yes it has bearings to both the patients and the caretakers....lovely take...!!!

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    1. Anjan!! Coming from you, this is a very gratifying compliment. Thanks... :)))

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  7. Very touching.
    The general mood is low and I can relate.

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    1. Thank you, Indrani. You read it so well!! I am glad you could relate... :)))

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  8. Hvn't ever come across such situation but your writing depicts the pain so well that now i can actually feel it...the fight within...wish nobdy has to go through..it must be so frustating n painful..
    Happy new year mam :)

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    1. Sadia...you sure know how to make me very happy...:))) Thanks a zillion....
      A very happy 2013 to you too:))

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  9. Beautiful poem ... the journey of life and hoping for a better tomorrow is so well expressed !!!

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    1. Speck, I am glad you could relate to this... thank you for your words and for the visit... :))

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  10. I was wondering where you have been? And ah!!! I see this..:-) you wrote a profound poem out of such simple words...touching..

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    1. FIF...It warms my heart to read your comment.... :))))Thanks a lot... I am so glad you like this...

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  11. I would like to say thanks for the efforts you have made compiling this article. You have been an inspiration for me. I’ve forwarded this to a friend of mine. From Never give up

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    1. Lucky, You are my much needed dose of appreciation... :))))) Thanks a lot... I am so glad you like this... and could relate to it.

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  12. lovely use of the three words .. you made a poem out of them WOW..



    Bikram's

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    1. Thanks a lot Bikram! Btw, Hats off to your patience... I mean... all of you. :)))

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  13. What an imaginative and excellent word smith you are Panchali!

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    1. Thank you for your words and for the visit, Amit... :))

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  14. Very nice and heart touching poem.
    Wish you a Happy and prosperous New Year 2013

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    1. Welcome to my space, Saibaba. :))

      I am glad you enjoyed reading this... thank you for your words and for the visit... :))
      A happy and a prosperous 2013 to you and your family too!

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  15. soul stirring poem..I do agree that care-givers need to have a high degree of tolerance for sure ..
    you actually have a skillful way with words..

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    1. Thanks for the encouragement... good to see you here always, Odyzz... :)))) Yeah...the caregivers need that 'high degree of tolerance'!!

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  16. It is quite frustrating when you forget something and try your very best to bring it back to your memory and having said that, I can't imagine how difficult life is for those who are suffering from Alzheimer. You've very well depicted their condition. These lines very well portray their silent suffering;
    "It is waging a useless war with ‘omitted memories’
    Nothing re-assembles, as I contemplate."

    I wish you a pleasant weekend, ma'am.

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    1. Zunnur, Your words are most gracious.Yes, it is painful to see a person going through this trauma. I have seen my father in law's suffering. But to help them is what makes us human I guess..isn't it?
      Glad you enjoyed...thanks a ton!

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  17. Only those who go through it knows the agony, pain and discomfort of it. 'Ah, memory such a fickle thing,' this expression is so deep and tells us how things can be important and irrelevant at the same time.

    Powerful and sensitive take!

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    1. Saru...Coming from you, that's a huge compliment. I am thrilled by your words...:)))
      And the best part of your comment is...you picked up the most meaningful sentence!!I am glad you have understood the core of the poem.Thanks a lot for the fabulous comment. You made me feel good... :)))))

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  18. such a wonderful poem ... its tough both for the people suffering and the caregivers .

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    1. Welcome to my space, Bhai:)
      Thank you for the appreciation and the visit... :)))))

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  19. Wonderful poem :)

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    1. Thank you, snowsnoddyworld for your visit and comments...
      And a warm welcome to my space!:)

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  20. :(... its sad and an extremely touching poem. I usually shy away from giving compliments but you are truly an amazing writer/poet.

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    1. Godddess!!! Coming from you, that's a huge compliment. I am thrilled by your words...:)))
      Good to see you after a long time!!:)

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  21. At war with omitted memories :)A beautiful poem describing what all goes with alzemir's patients. A very tough disease to bear. An ode from the caregivers, this was really a heart touching post Panchali Mam. take care !

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  22. Brilliant.
    Before I forget, "Wish you and your family Happy New Year".

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    1. Thanks Rajesh for your compliment! Do appreciate.
      Happy 2013 to you and your family too :))

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  23. I saw in your comments that you took care of your father in law - he was very lucky to have you there to help him.

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    1. I am glad you took time to read all the comments...Yes, we did..and for about ten years he was with us!! It was tough, but today we are glad we did !!
      Thanks for stopping by, Robyn!

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  24. Lovely poem..touching for I know someone who suffers from this and it reminded me of her,

    I had heard somewhere that the sufferer and the person who helps them at such time both feel the pain of this disease. The pain and the apathy very well brought out in your words.

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    1. Me! Thanks so much for coming by and sharing your thoughts. And thanks for the words of appreciation... :)

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  25. it is so hard to see them suffering knowing they know they can't remember but want to.This was well put.

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    1. Sheilagh...It is. I have witnessed my father in law's struggle--it was pathetic!I am glad my husband and his siblings gave him the emotional support he needed, while I looked after his daily needs.
      Glad I managed to communicate what I wanted to....:))Thanks a ton!

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  26. Having seen it firsthand in my grandparents, I can totally identify with the poem...You have brought out the anguish really well Panchaliji.

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    1. Welcome Reshma :))
      Thanks for the visit and the wonderful words of appreciation. They mean much to me...

      Cheers...!

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  27. Sad is the plight of those people who suffer from Alzheimer. I've always wondered what went through their minds. Your words give me an idea. I know how painful it is for people who love them to see them in that condition.

    The first part of your beautifully written poem brought to mind the Notebook story. Hmm...

    I hope the new year has been good so far. Happy 2013.

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    1. Divya, Good to have you back!
      Yes, I have seen the strain and pain of a patient suffering with dementia experience ...it IS terrible! I haven't read Notebook story. Shall google it and get hold of the book.
      Thanks a lot, for your words of appreciation. I do appreciate...:)0

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  28. Suffering of any kind need to be alleviated even if through poetry! Happy New Year Panchali!!

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    1. Well said, Rahul. As they say---'live for today, hope for tomorrow!'Thanks for coming by...:))

      Happy 2013 to you and your family too,Rahul.

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  29. A poetess mind looks at things deep than anybody... deeper than a doctor!

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    1. Awww...thanks for such beautiful comment...am absolutely gratified, Sathish :)
      Thank you.

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  30. Sometimes I think, loss of memory in old age is a blessing in disguise. The slate is wiped clean and you don't remember regrets and betrayals of the past...

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    1. Dr Madhvi...You couldn't have said it better! Why didn't I think on that line. I wonder now :D
      Thanks a ton for that poignant comment!

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  31. wonderful! you have blended in the 3 words so well, they are completely in sync! and yea, that's a real issue that senior citizens face and the younger generation is totally clueless about their struggle...just a little understanding and love is all they need...

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    1. Absolutely, Princess. The patients need care and big time emotional support, reassurance and help with a range of day to day tasks..

      Thank you for your encouraging words and for coming by...:)) xoxo

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  32. My dad had Alzheimer's. I live in fear. You expressed it well.

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    1. Thank you, Shovan...Man cannot live without anxiety and this condition is genetic. But, don't worry, it doesn't happen to everyone. I tell my husband that, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.Forget about it!

      Let me share a quote ...
      "The secret of life is to have no fear; it's the only way to function.
      Stokely Carmichae
      Thanks for being here..:)

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  33. Sad and touching poem!

    Why don't God give us strength to forget painful memories and remember basic things to keep life going. Very painful when a person needs to suffer from both forgetfulness and dependence :/

    Happy new year Ma'am!

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    1. You said it, Valli. It is a difficult truth that our only true comfort lies in the arms of Him who has allowed us to endure the grief and pain we face.....strange, isn't it?

      A very happy and a prosperous New year to you and your family, Valli!
      Thanks a lot for that meaningful comment!

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  34. Wow, what a strong poem you have written here! You definitely have given the person with Alzheimers a voice. This is the cruelest of illnesses; and I pray they will find a cure for it so that those afflicted and their caregivers can carry on..... Always so glad to read your words!!

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    1. Thank you for a beautiful comment, Mary. Amen to your prayers!! Pleasure to see you here...always :))))

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  35. Oh, it most certainly is a nagging disease! Nicely written.

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    1. Yes, I do agree, Cosmo. It's a dreaded disease! Thanks for the appreciative comment.:)

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  36. lovely words...nicely crafted lines!

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    1. Thank you, Kalyan... your words delight me. :))

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  37. very well said! a little help and support topped with love is all they need!

    Novel...

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    1. I am so glad you liked this, Novel... Thanks for coming by... :))

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  38. Fantastic lines. Alzheimer's is scary. I had seen a wonderful documentary on this which was about an old man getting lost and his family in panic...

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  39. themoonstone, I think, I have missed that documentary. It should be worth worthing....
    Thank you so much for your visit here, taking time to read and comment. Happy to read your appreciation. :)))

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    1. Found the video...but the old man didn't have Alzheimers.. was just about an old man getting lost in a big city..If he had Alzheimers probably the story would have been even more tragic.Based on a true story..the dialogues are in Malayalam but has english subtitles..

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7F0PDt-qL5o

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    2. What a beautiful video, moonstone! Maybe, the old man developed partial Alzheimers...I am glad that the old man eventually reached his home. Loss of memory, even if it is temporary can be so scary!
      Thanks a lot for the link..

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