Wednesday, January 23, 2013

A Bonfire~





Eighty three years, three months and million whirls
Of earth she has allowed--- under her ageing toes
Struggling up the trail through the morning mist
clawing at the ground, she whispers:
 ‘ah, time to live like chickens in cages’!
The notes tremble in her throat,
 Her inner voice takes over choric tones...
 send nothing…neither logic
nor happy dreams….
Existence, at some point of time
 becomes meaningless…
She hastens up the path
Stands in front of her garden
Wonder of wonders…A BONFIRE
Burning, adjacent to her own garden
 feeds her soul
She inhales the smoke of the
Rotten heaps of compost… and realizes
We all have our boundaries, distances to travel
At one point, the outside world comes
To sit at our fences
Ah, destiny is a picket fence
A porch for the old folks
To sit alone… and lament
Silence…absence means nothing!



Shared with Poets United: Verse-first-FENCE

100 comments:

  1. Oh, this is a sad and very 'meaty' write, Panchali. I do hope I never reach the point where 'existence becomes meaningless,' but I do know that at some point this happens for some people....the elders who sit all alone one day, or those in nursing homes with their four walls and routines. I think we all have to guard against this happening...somehow.

    And for this person the boundary eventually became the fence, the furthest distance traveled. And smelling compost. Sad fate for a life.

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    1. Mary,
      No one in this world, be that person a scholar, doctor or a person of authority, can alleviate the sufferings of an individual. It is rightly said, ‘The world laughs with one who laughs; nobody is interested in one who is alone and lonely in old age.’
      c'est a la vie...!!
      Cheerfulness of the Mind is possible only through Self-realization....I tried to depict that towards the end...:)
      Ahaa, read your beautiful poem just now, Mary....Hats off to you!! There's so much to learn from you, my dear :))
      Thanka a lot!

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    2. Panchali, you are so wise. You are right...no one can alleviate an individual's suffering. So sad though that so few are interested in one who is alone in old age. Yes, I see the self realization....I guess one must grow to appreciate what one has even if it is not much. And, dear friend, I have so much to learn from YOU. You are so wise, Panchali. I cannot hold a candle to your wisdom.

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    3. Awe Mary, A humble "thank you" for a great honor...!! Such an appreciative comment from a prolific writer as yourself leaves me happy and content.
      Thanks a bunch, my friend!:)

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  2. A meaningless existence is really painful ... you have depicted it so well !!

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    1. Speck...or, should I say, Amrit :) At my age in reflective moods, thoughts come and go. As I said earlier, I am attached to an organization who works for the old and homeless people, so, sometimes experiences rankle the mind and one wishes to share it with friends. Writing is therapeutic...hence, I jot down and disturb others!:(
      Thanks for your constant support and encouragement.

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  3. This made me jittery, Am I also going to face a similar situation, with world buzzing around me without making me its part! And self realization, it is as difficult to come as it seems easy. The fact is as one grows old and lonely the more one becomes restless. I have seen it with many people.

    You are an amazing writer and a very sensitive poet. Hats off!

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    1. Meenakshi...it is scary indeed. Human minds see no logic after a certain age. ...every human mind has a different story to tell in the end. The stories are complicated so is life...
      Your comments always a source of inspiration for me..that I am doing alright! Thanks a million-:)))

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  4. What a poignant composition. It effuses pain right from inner walls of the heart. A tale of pain, absence, meaninglessness told in the most remarkable way. That's beautiful. I am in.

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    1. Yes...That is true... but there are exceptions!! So cheer up, deepak.:)

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  5. *PANCHALI*
    Your poetry is beautiful.
    You are very sensitive, sensitive man.
    I admire you.
    I am proud to know you, I regret that virtually.
    Sending kisses.
    Lucia

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    Replies
    1. Lucia !! Your visits delight me...Glad to be counted as a virtual friend!The feelings are mutual my friend. The realization of just how well we are all connected in this world makes me emotional.Come over to India...and don't regret ...we shall meet some day! Amen!
      Hugs back:)

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  6. You have narrated the pathos of old age very sensitively,so many pains to bear in that age-physical,mental & emotional--no wonder life loses it's meaning.It sends a shiver down the spine-we see & try to help-but their agony is theirs' alone.

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    1. Indu..When danger looms or threatens, the ostriches normally bury their heads in sands. Not seeing the reality gives ostriches a kind of assurance of safety.....similarly, in old age, a human mind's perception of the world gets myopic. I believe, an alert mind and thinking skills gives one a clear distinction between truth and fact...which helps one to get over pain, solitude and agony. Whatever...old age is scary!

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  7. Very painful...and yet beautiful!

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    1. Appreciative of your visit to my sight; do keep visiting, Amit. Thanks a lot!

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  8. Your well-honed words tell the tale of a life lived, road traveled and an end to the journey in sight. Some sadness, yes, but also a reflection on much achieved. And it is true that we are born in and of ourselves and die the same. Nicely done.

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    1. Kim...You read it so well !!May all writers be blessed with readers such as you... :) Thanks for the visit...
      Thanks a ton!:)

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  9. Replies
    1. Pattu Raj...Thank you. I am glad you liked this... :)))

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  10. Thank God for the bonfire and the spark of life this one feels. Hold on, Hold on to it! That is my prayer.

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    1. Susan..a silent prayer that stirs within... is always ready to come out!!! That lit the bonfire :) Thanks a bunch!

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  11. Replies
    1. Eashwar...Thank you...:))))))

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  12. I adore this poem, especially "destiny is a picket fence, a porch for the old folks". I love how the bonfire lifts her heart. Wonderful writing!

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    1. Sherry..you... write comments that make me feel on top of the world.Thanks a lot, for the visit and some thought provoking comments.:))

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  13. p.s. Panchali, would you please email me at wildwoman2@shaw.ca ? I cant find a way to email you, kiddo. Thanks.

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  14. Sometimes we do have to sit alone and lament. Beautifully written ;-)

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    1. Ashwini...Cant help them about it'...? Uh huh...!!?? :))))Thanks for your appreciation and constant encouragement:)

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  15. A lucid moment here, freed from the illogic of the chicken coop.

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    1. Unlived... there are still people, Libby. If one wants to have mental fortitude when times get tough, we need break the boring patterns and take a different road — in many cases a harder road.
      Thanks a bunch:)

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  16. At one point, the outside world comes
    To sit at our fences...this and all, stunning, simply stunning. Thank-you.

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    1. Thank you, Janet. The unfortunate thing is that most of old people that I know of, greatly disregard the aspect of mental preparation or self-realization. At some point of time...the outside world will climb up to our window sill---that's the way life twists and turns...
      Coming from you, this is a very gratifying compliment. Thanks... :)))

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  17. Wow, you cover a lot in this one, taking us on an inner and outer journey. I like the philosophical refections at the end.

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    1. Rosemary! Loved to see you here.... this once... :))Thank you. I am glad you liked this... :)) :)))

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  18. Such a poignant piece--really wonderful!

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    1. Thanks so much, Audrey :) Really wonderful having you here!

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  19. Oh my! that's a taste of things to come. I actually got lost in those lines and actually went 'there' for a while. Bee-yooti-fully crafted!

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    1. Divya..In a survival situation, mental toughness is what will take us across the other side..and I am sure, we'll sail through...Amen!
      Sooo pleased you liked it....! Thank you.... :))))

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  20. Wow! What a shot!
    Great lines too.

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    1. Indrani..The pic is not mine...it's from google!Thanks for the visit and good words of appreciation. I am thrlled!:)

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  21. I see you changed your blog. And even though this is what I mean by your 'best poetry', you also made me cry with this piece. It is a terrible thing how people feel lonely and left out at this point in their lives. It should not be like that. You're loved by all your fans and even me. Don't you ever feel like a chicken in a cage! The world is still yours to conquer!
    Love.

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    1. Chhavi, From you... that comment makes me give a sigh of relief. I expected you to pan it.. :))) Did yiu not like the change...? I hope, you did!
      I am yet to reach that stage, actually have a few more decades to reach 83! But, thanks for your assurance and love...your words will be with me always! It will be a great tonic and would help me build up my mental strength:) Smiles.
      Thanks...

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    2. To me, your blog is always a treat because of your words n those cutie owls! And I'm happy you haven't reached that age yet, but when you do, don't ever feel like this.

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    3. Thanks doll. I am STOKED:)

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  22. Replies
    1. Scary...but, that's life, Deepak :(( Thanks!

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  23. I guess I'm short of words to praise this work of yours... :)

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    1. No...that's exaggeration, Cynosure!!! But, your comment is greatly appreciated!

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  24. Replies
    1. Thank you, aliasgarmukhtiar mukhtiar:)

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  25. Your existence becomes meaningless as soon as you accept the same.yes, life changes with time but if you accept this change cheerfully and absorb into it,and at least keep one of your passions alive ,it won't be scary(specially for a wonderful person like you,it can never be) ..My bad,that's what my moronic mind says...else is an individual's experience and perception..
    The trauma depicted just moved my heart...Incredible piece!!

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    1. Odyzz...Ha Ha... well... there could be truth in what you say. But, I just hope at the age of 83, wonderful readers like you will still be around to encourage and support me :D:D
      This reminds me of Robert Frost's famous lines:
      'The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
      But I have promises to keep,
      And miles to go before I sleep...' :))
      Your words of appreciation made my day.. thank you..

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  26. Existence is meaningful only when we, each one of us, give meaning to it.

    I loved the poem for its feelings and content.

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    1. As they say---'When everyone knows everyone else's business, you get a feeling of connection and security'!!
      Pleasure to see you here. Thanks for dropping in.. :))

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  27. inspite of the pathos, there is an underlying positiveness to it....an acceptance of 'yeah,this is life, and my absence will not be missed, but im still going on and will keep going on...

    what a lovely poem! loved it!

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    1. Princess...There, you said it all. :))))Be that as it may, as long as you liked the poem, I am so very pleased. :)) Thanks my dear:)

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  28. I'm hoping that my destiny offers more than a front porch and a chair! :D Wonderfully written piece, and thoroughly enjoyable.

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    1. miskmask...I thought, it only nuts like me who're worried about future pride and peace of mind. Good to know, I have a companion:)))) OK, I am praying for you :D:D
      Thanks..I am happy to see you on my space... hope you will keep coming.

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  29. Wonderfully said. It is not easy.

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    1. Thanks Rajesh...yes, it isn't easy! Am glad an avid reader like you liked it... :))

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  30. Replies
    1. OE!! I am very happy you liked the story... and agree with its basic premise. :))) Wonderful having you here..:)

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  31. Your poem reminds me of why I started writing: to keep my mind active while growing older, and to make friends with myself so I won't be lonely when I do. So far, it's working. Very thoughtful write,

    Elizabeth

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    1. I find there are at least two stages to writing. The first stage is when you feel really good and confident. The second stage is when you think, “OMG, it’s all awful.” hahaha...Jokes apart, it works!!
      Love to see you here, Elizabeth... :))
      Thanks!

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  32. so beautiful, and gripping. You do wonders with words Panchali!

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    1. Good to see you after along time! arghh...You write a zillion times better than I do..
      Thanks for your kind words, poonam!:) And I hope you don't vanish again...:))))

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  33. poignant and emotive . . love your magic with words ma'm ! :)

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    1. Maliny...Thanks for the praise... you are so good for my ego.. :))))You are also such a good writer:))
      Thanks re..

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  34. Oh such sadness...........

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  35. Oh Panchali, terrific - what philosophy touching daily life, the sadness of the poem as it ends is both beautiful and deeply meaningful.

    We all have our boundaries, distances to travel
    At one point, the outside world comes
    To sit at our fences
    Ah, destiny is a picket fence
    A porch for the old folks
    To sit alone… and lament

    Ufff! Bhishon bhalo legechey :))

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    Replies
    1. Hiya....! Long time no see...? You were missed...hope you are good...?!
      In India, loneliness is marginally more... that's all... Thank you for coming by... glad you enjoyed reading this.. :))
      Tomake dekhe amaro khub bhalo lagchey. Ki re...fb tey o dekhina tomake...grrr

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  36. Sad but true...such becomes the state of mind of those in the higher bracket of age, where life reduces to counting the number of breaths...surrounded by loved ones who are busy in making their way into this world stepping up the ladder...

    very well put! Panchali Di

    Novel...

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    Replies
    1. Novel...Social isolation and loneliness have long been identified as problems associated with old age. I believe, most of the measures of social isolation are unrelated to the subjective
      measures of well-being, ...just companionship and the availability of confidant relationships are significant!!
      And I most certainly am not one as yet....! I like people... especially young people like you..!! :))))))

      Thanks for coming by...:))

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  37. Replies
    1. Thank you so much, Nagini... you made my day...:)))

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  38. Beautiful poem . I could feel the insecurity , the loneliness ...

    my biggest inspiration has been my grandmother ...she lived until 86 but she lived her life to the full. She was not afraid of anyone , she was loving but at the same time made sure that everyone respected her .

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    1. TTT, Thank you for the 'well-written' comment...so good to know about your proud grandma.
      I am yet to reach that bracket, but am old enough to have learned that life doesn't always give us what we want, nor what we might feel we are entitled to.... I made some bad choices for which I take full responsibility, but in place of parenthood I have a precious gift, and one I do not underestimate....and that;s my dotty! Hopefully, she'll give me the respect and dignity that my age would demand. Amen!
      Thanks so much for coming by...

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  39. This takes the truth and smacks you with it. Well done!

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    1. Yes, Dave...When the truth smacks you in the face...best is to brush it off & accept it! Isn't it? But, according to me, normally folks are not all that bad....:)))
      Thank you... I am glad that you liked it... and it is such a pleasure to have you!!

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  40. I like 'destiny is a picket fence', great write!

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    1. Thanks rch for stopping by..and for your encouragement!

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  41. Hi, I am DEEPAK, author of blog "The Original Poetry" & I hereby Nominate your blog for THE LIEBSTER BLOG AWARD.
    For more details kindly refer to Liebster Blog Award post at http://theoriginalpoetry.blogspot.in/2013/01/liebster-award-time-to-rejoice.html
    Await your comments, Thanks!! :)

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    Replies
    1. Wow, this is my fifth leibster award!! I am elated and honored, Deepak!!Thanks for the award, really appreciate.:))))

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  42. Panchali, it is so beautiful, poignant and tugs at one's heart strings.

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    1. Goodie!It is nice to see you here after a long time. Thanks so much for your wonderful words of appreciation. You made my day, Rachna:)
      Thanks!:)

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  43. This one makes the winter season a character! Loved the way you ended it by bringing deep meaning to it :D

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    1. nice and warm...huh?? Your presence is warmly appreciated, ghaz:))
      hugzz

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  44. post reading; for a moment i drowned myself into such a mood of emptiness...
    I feel its just not to-do-nothing makes old folks feel empty but its being in a empty space along with old chaps who were left empty by their empty-heart off-springs makes them so...

    prominent, poignant, profound, proficient.

    Bow to you Mam.

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    Replies
    1. A human presence, or companionship in old age is the biggest gift one can give to the elders. You read it so well, my dear.You're a good human being. kudos..
      Thanks a lot for your comment:)I am touched, Sathish.

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  45. lovely poignant words....so beautiful & striking!

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  46. This poem is my favorite till now among all the poems you've written. Got a different feeling while reading that I can't explain....Loved these lines especially

    "The notes tremble in her throat,
    Her inner voice takes over choric tones...
    send nothing…neither logic
    nor happy dreams"

    Keep rocking with your beautiful poetry as always!

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  47. This reminds me of an elderly lady I once met on a train. She had three sons and two daughters and yet lived in a retirement home with her husband. She cried tears of loneliness and an overwhelming sense of betrayal by her own children seeped through every word she spoke. I resolved then and there that I would never let my parents see a day when the spirit dies before the body meets dust.

    It is a testament to the inspiration your poem provided that I have written such a long comment! I am sure to become a regular reader of yours from now on :)

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  48. so emotional..one's suffering is only hers,,no body can understand others sufferings..

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